Week #3
It’s now week #3 of MLWTCO and I have some new developments to share with my fan(s):
I am now, more than ever before, terrified of tiny planes. I had to fly on a 1 aisle 2, 13 row “plane” last week, in the middle of a rain storm and low cloud coverage, with 28mph out of the NW and this made for a very scared Road Warrior. I didn’t even realize until the Talker next to me pointed it out, but my legs were shaking. I was that scared. When the turbulence settled down for a bit and the Flight Attendant was passing through the aisle with in-flight beverage service, I decided to take control of the situation and self-medicate with a bottle of red. I drank it right from the bottle in like 3 big gulps. Jammahs keeps it classy. It’s all a little fuzzy, but if I remember correctly, the Talker had nothing to comment on this behavior.
I still keep the fond memories of my old Briggs close to my heart, but I am really crushing on my new Briggs. It’s lighter and sleeker than the original and has all sorts of neat pockets for things like liquids (for those suckers who actually take their liquids out). I really dig the inside zipped pocket where I put my shoes—it keeps the dirt and germs off of all my other personal items. I’m just as protective over this Briggs as I was with my old Briggs. I was really upset when at CLE my Briggs didn’t fit into the Ladies stall. I had to leave him right outside and watch him through the little slit. It was either that or risk him touching the toilet which I can’t ever have happen. There’s nothing more disturbing than a Briggs brushing on toilet bowl situation.
Now, in all my years of hotel living, I’ve never stayed at one with walls as thin as those that are in this Marriott. I hear any and all of the above: phone ringing, sneezing, talking, text alerts , TVs, snoring and OPERA SINGING. Yes, the woman living in the room next me apparently was an accomplished opera singer and used the appropriate time of 645am-745am to practice her craft. I could probably come up with a variety of clever complaints to now rant on and on and on about, but I don’t know, I kind of enjoyed it. It was sort of neat to lay in bed, confused as to what your next step should be—do you silently curse this woman for waking you up or just lay calmly and enjoy the little show? I just went with along with it and appreciated the tone, clarity and pitch of her singing. I closed my eyes and pretended I was standing in a piazza in Italy during like the Renaissance Era or that I was with Edward Lewis at the San Francisco Opera with my red dress and ruby and diamond jewelry, but then it hit me, I’m at a Category 3 Marriott in the middle of Sucky, Suckerville, USA.
Opera aside, I think the highlight of my travels was when the TSA agent stopped me to say that he liked my pedicure polish color (Essie Bordeaux). He failed to mention that my liquids were still in my carry-on and I should mention that those liquids were well above 3.11 FL limit. But, yet, he liked my polish color. Bizarre. You make sure the skies are safe and all passengers are properly manicured and pedicured, TSA agent at LGA!
I am now, more than ever before, terrified of tiny planes. I had to fly on a 1 aisle 2, 13 row “plane” last week, in the middle of a rain storm and low cloud coverage, with 28mph out of the NW and this made for a very scared Road Warrior. I didn’t even realize until the Talker next to me pointed it out, but my legs were shaking. I was that scared. When the turbulence settled down for a bit and the Flight Attendant was passing through the aisle with in-flight beverage service, I decided to take control of the situation and self-medicate with a bottle of red. I drank it right from the bottle in like 3 big gulps. Jammahs keeps it classy. It’s all a little fuzzy, but if I remember correctly, the Talker had nothing to comment on this behavior.
I still keep the fond memories of my old Briggs close to my heart, but I am really crushing on my new Briggs. It’s lighter and sleeker than the original and has all sorts of neat pockets for things like liquids (for those suckers who actually take their liquids out). I really dig the inside zipped pocket where I put my shoes—it keeps the dirt and germs off of all my other personal items. I’m just as protective over this Briggs as I was with my old Briggs. I was really upset when at CLE my Briggs didn’t fit into the Ladies stall. I had to leave him right outside and watch him through the little slit. It was either that or risk him touching the toilet which I can’t ever have happen. There’s nothing more disturbing than a Briggs brushing on toilet bowl situation.
Now, in all my years of hotel living, I’ve never stayed at one with walls as thin as those that are in this Marriott. I hear any and all of the above: phone ringing, sneezing, talking, text alerts , TVs, snoring and OPERA SINGING. Yes, the woman living in the room next me apparently was an accomplished opera singer and used the appropriate time of 645am-745am to practice her craft. I could probably come up with a variety of clever complaints to now rant on and on and on about, but I don’t know, I kind of enjoyed it. It was sort of neat to lay in bed, confused as to what your next step should be—do you silently curse this woman for waking you up or just lay calmly and enjoy the little show? I just went with along with it and appreciated the tone, clarity and pitch of her singing. I closed my eyes and pretended I was standing in a piazza in Italy during like the Renaissance Era or that I was with Edward Lewis at the San Francisco Opera with my red dress and ruby and diamond jewelry, but then it hit me, I’m at a Category 3 Marriott in the middle of Sucky, Suckerville, USA.
Opera aside, I think the highlight of my travels was when the TSA agent stopped me to say that he liked my pedicure polish color (Essie Bordeaux). He failed to mention that my liquids were still in my carry-on and I should mention that those liquids were well above 3.11 FL limit. But, yet, he liked my polish color. Bizarre. You make sure the skies are safe and all passengers are properly manicured and pedicured, TSA agent at LGA!
posted by Jammahs at 7:25 AM
3 Comments:
I have a great visual of the Red being consumed :) That seems like a great way to discourage a talkative neighbor *filing away for future use*
Oh, TSA. That is ridiculous. I had my own disappointment with them last week when the lady didn't even speak enough English to understand "trash can".
Great to have you back on the road so I can laugh along with your travels . . . Bordeaux is a winter colah though, why did you select that for spring?
Leave it to SQ to focus on the nail polish colah.
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